Whose Money is it Anyway? (Part 4–Enough)


“I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.

I wish you enough rain to make you appreciate the day even more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.

I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest joys of life may appear bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final goodbye.

Bob Perks—Chicken Soup for the Grieving Soul 2003

 

I made the decision long ago to live within my means.  After my bankruptcy in 1996, I decided I was never going down that road again.

I didn’t know anything about tithing at that point, but I did know a thing or two about budgeting.  When you are living on public assistance, and only have about $20 a week to feed a family of four, you know exactly how many cans of tomato soup that will buy.

Somewhere along the line, I learned the 10-10-80 principle.  How this works is that you tithe the first 10% of your paycheck (or give it to charity, if you don’t have a home church).  Then, you save the next 10% and live off of the remaining 80%.

This is scary when you’re poor.  If 100% of your paycheck isn’t enough to get by, how are you going to do it on 80%?

What I have learned, as I elaborated in Part 3 of this series, is that when you keep your priorities in the proper order, you’ll always have enough.  We never ate fancy, but we never went hungry.  We could always keep at least one car running and one utility connected.  In short, we learned how much “enough” really was.

However, it’s one thing to have black numbers at the end of your monthly budget.  It’s quite another to be OK with the black number, no matter how small it is.  As Paul said to the Philippians:

I am telling you this, but not because I need something.  I have learned to be satisfied with what I have and with whatever happens.  I know how to live when I am poor and when I have plenty.  I have learned the secret of how to live through any kind of situation—when I have enough to eat or when I am hungry, when I have everything I need or when I have nothing. Christ is the one who gives me the strength I need to do whatever I must do.  Php 4:11-13 (ERV)

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Content, whatever the circumstances

Our circumstances change, and they are almost always beyond our control.  Contentedness, however, is an attitude that we can cultivate and apply to any situation.  It is the attitude that whatever we have, it is always enough.

If we can develop this attitude when we don’t have much, then God begins to trust us with more.  For this reason, He requires contentedness as a condition of stewardship.  When we are content with what we have, we are not tempted to gain more by dishonest means.  As Jesus cautioned us:

 

The one who manages the little he has been given with faithfulness and integrity will be promoted and trusted with greater responsibilities.  But those who cheat with the little they have been given will not be considered trustworthy to receive more.  If you have not handled the riches of this world with integrity, why should you be trusted with the eternal treasures of the spiritual world?  Luke 16:10-11 (TPT)

 

Have you ever wondered why so many TV evangelists and prosperity gospel hucksters end up disgraced?  It’s this principle at work.  They are not content with what they have.  So, they take the Lord’s name in vain by using it to cheat people, building up their own treasures on earth.  Their messages end up as corrupted as their hearts, and NO ONE gets blessed.

 
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Faithfulness and Integrity

So, what does it look like to manage your money with faithfulness and integrity?  There are many examples, but here are seven that I am currently trying or have already had success with:

 

  1. Avoid get rich quick schemes. I went into detail about this in Part 2.  This is what led to the bankruptcy I mentioned in the opening paragraph.
  2. Save gradually. Have a goal amount ($1,000 is a good place to start), but don’t obsess about the date.  Getting there is more important than WHEN you get there.
  3. Employ the debt snowball method. Although logic suggests paying down accounts with the highest interest rate first, those drowning in debt have a psychological need to see progress.  The debt snowball method involves paying off your smallest debt first, while making minimum payments on other accounts.  Once the smallest account is paid off, take the amount you paid toward that and add it to the minimum payment on your next largest account.  As you continue this process, you will gain momentum, and your accounts will STAY paid off.
  4. Use a cashback credit card like a debit card. (NOTE: IF YOU HAVE GOTTEN INTO TROUBLE WITH CREDIT CARD DEBT DUE TO LACK OF DISCIPLINE IN THE PAST, PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR LIMITS AND SKIP THIS STEP.)  We chose the Quicksilver card from Capital One, but there are other cards that might be more beneficial based on your individual spending patterns.  We pay for EVERYTHING on this card, then pay the balance in full each month, so that we do not ever pay interest on it.  With every purchase, we get 1.5% cash back.  This doesn’t sound like much, but we let that bonus cash accumulate and have Capital One send us a check on the first of November, which then becomes our Christmas Fund.  This year, the check was for $687.62.
  5. Pay cash for everything. Once you have completed step 3, paying down all your debts, don’t make new ones.  Pay cash for everything you get (or use the cashback credit card from step 4, but ONLY if you are paying the balance in full EVERY month).  If you don’t have enough cash right then for a large purchase, a car for instance, wait until you do, or find another way to leverage your income (or add to it).  If contentedness is your priority, this will prove easier than you might think.  We made our last car payment on September 5, 2013—over seven years ago.  We have paid cash for a newer car since then.
  6. Save more than you need to. This is my most recent method.  As retirement has now become a visible light at the end of a tunnel that is getting shorter by the day, I am realizing that my 3-months’ expense savings milestone may not be adequate as a nest egg.  For this reason, we have paused our debt snowball and are only making the regular mortgage payments on our home, which is our only remaining debt.  Our reasoning behind this is that we will likely be selling the house before we pay it off completely, even at the accelerated rate.  So we are doing a “reverse snowball” of sorts and taking the amount that we had set aside for paying down the mortgage quickly and putting that into an interest-bearing savings account, which we will not touch until after we have ridden off into the sunset.
  7. Set an example for your children. The first six steps are of little use unless you pass on the wisdom to your children.  They understand more than you might think.  Don’t insult them by withholding the concept of money management until they are “old enough to handle it.”  The danger you are courting there is that your children will develop an attitude of entitlement, rather than contentment, which can become hard-wired into their personalities long before they ever learn what a spreadsheet is.

Blessed to be a blessing

I have learned what it is to have enough, and to recognize when I have been blessed with more than enough, which is pretty much all the time.

And we are blessed to be a blessing, so that everyone has enough.  This goes much deeper than wealth distribution, which the government can handle.  This is about an attitude in the heart of every individual by which we can find the joy in our circumstances, whatever they may be.

Therefore, dear readers, in this season of Thanksgiving, I wish you enough.

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Do Unto Others: Part 5–Faithful

Hold on to loyal love and don’t let go, and be faithful to all that you’ve been taught.  Let your life be shaped by integrity, with truth written upon your heart.  That’s how you will find favor and understanding with both God and men—you will gain the reputation of living life well.  Proverbs 3:3-4 (TPT)

In Part 3, we learned that one way to win the respect of others is to mind our own business and show appreciation.  Here’s another one—being faithful.

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Probably the most common way we use the word “faithful” today is in the context of a relationship.  When we are “faithful” to a significant other, it is a sign of focus and commitment.

 

The original Hebrew word emeth, rendered “faithful” in the verse above has much more depth.  It means sturdy, stable and trustworthy.  Something you can depend on without thinking twice.  In the King James Version, emeth is most frequently translated as “truth,” so you can see why it’s a favorite word of mine!

 

The word signifies things that are firmly established as being right.  To apply this word to a person would be to describe them as reliable, sincere, and one who clings to the Truth.  And as we proclaim God as the source and embodiment of all Truth, it stands to reason then that a faithful person is reflecting the image of a faithful God.

We like it when we can rely on people, don’t we?  It sure takes a lot of stress out of life when you know you can count on someone.

 

Sometimes, though, it seems that we may not put as much energy as we should into being that kind of person.  If faithfulness is a sure way to win respect, then a sure way to lose it is hypocrisy.

 

A hypocrite is, at the heart, a pretender.  A hypocrite shows you one face while being someone else underneath.  If a person makes a habit of being this way, it won’t take long for the word to get out.  A hypocrite is untrustworthy, because you never know what to expect from such a person.  One thing you won’t expect is truth and faithfulness.

 

There is no room for hypocrisy in the Church.  As Paul advised to the Colossians:

 

Don’t lie to each other.  You’ve gotten rid of the person you used to be and the life you used to live, and you’ve become a new person.  This new person is continually renewed in knowledge to be like its Creator.  Colossians 3:9-10 (GW)

 

If you have professed Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, none of the bad stuff you did before counts against you, but there’s a catch.  You can’t go back and do that stuff anymore.  (Of course, if your conversion is genuine, you won’t want to anyway, so it’s all good.)  But God created you in His image, and if you have accepted His invitation, you have become eternally adopted into His family.  Since God is the source of all love and the essence of all Truth, that means you have His faithfulness in your DNA.

 

It doesn’t matter who you are or where you came from.  God created you to do the work He had planned for you, but He also gives you the strength and endurance to perform this work faithfully.  When you follow through with that, it pleases God to see His plan working itself out in your life.

 

And as an extra added bonus, other people will notice not only the work you’re doing, but also the manner in which you do it.  They will see your sincerity and know that you are someone they can trust.

(Some days this is easier than others, however.  Come back for Part 6—Courageous.)

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The Kids Aren’t All Right: Part 4–Integrity

I am hurt and lonely.  Turn to me, and show me mercy.  Free me from my troubles.  Help me solve my problems.  Look at my trials and troubles.  Forgive me for all the sins I have done.  Look at all the enemies I have.  They hate me and want to hurt me.  Protect me!  Save me from them!  I come to you for protection, so don’t let me be disappointed.  You are good and do what is right.  I trust you to protect me.  (Psalm 25:16-21 ERV)

 

The words of King David ring true for many today, especially teenagers.  It is so easy to feel isolated and alone at that age.  In many cases, these kids actually ARE isolated and alone.  Sometimes it’s in their own heads, and sometimes it’s external, as a result of normal social inclusion/exclusion rites, or worse, as a product of bullying.

 

I notice this especially with girls.  Gossip and rumor-mongering are bad enough, but today’s technological advances have made hateful talk accelerate to light speed.  Couple that with this generation’s reliance upon/addiction to their mobile devices and it becomes nearly impossible to get a positive thought in edgewise between all of the notifications.

 

So what’s a parent to do?

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I believe that it all starts with integrity.  Integrity and uprightness, or honesty, is all we have left when everything else is taken away.  This is true for adults as well as teens.  If we lose everything–our jobs, our loved ones, our material possessions–then what is left behind?

 

Our character.

 

Who we really are behind all the masks, the social constructs, the rumors and the legends.

 

So who are we really?  If you lost everything except your life today, what would you have left to rebuild your life upon?

 

If you are a person of integrity, that is, you say what you mean, mean what you say, do what you say you are going to do and finish what you start, then you have all you need.  Because you are a person that others can trust and rely upon, then trusting people will do you that courtesy.  If these are the kind of kids we want to have, then these are the kind of parents we need to be.

 

So our primary goal is to be the kind of parents whose children look to us as David looked to God in the above passage.  Obviously, we are not perfect like God, but He created us in His image, which means that we have aspects of His character woven into our DNA.

 

When my children are up against it, I want them to know that they can look to me for help.  I want them to know that I will forgive their mistakes and give them room to grow.  They need to know that they have somewhere to turn when it seems like the world is crashing down on them.  I don’t ever want to let them down.  I want them to trust me to take care of them, even when they are older and don’t really need me to do that anymore.

 

But the only way I can be that kind of a father is to remember that I have a Father who does all of these things for me.  And so do my kids.  So it’s not really me I want them to trust, but God.  His integrity is flawless and will go on forever.  If I can point my kids to that, directly or through my own rudimentary example, then I will be giving them what they need to survive and overcome whatever comes their way.

(For the next step in living a life of integrity, come back for Part 5–Awake.)

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